She's Got A Ticket To Ride...
...and she's getting the fuck out of Liverpool.
If Britain had an anus, then Liverpool might be it. From their days in the Cavern Club, the Beatles then moved on to playing club shows in Hamburg, and I think I know why they were so eager to get to another country.
With no real natural beauty to speak of, and the Mersey cutting a swathe through the city like a brown smear of shit, I wandered up from my pissy lodgings in the south of the city and meandered through its streets to see if I could find any diamonds in the rough.
Can't say I found many, to be honest. The imposing edifice of the Liverpool cathedral was suitably gothic and attractive, but to my dismay visitors were not allowed in due to it being taken over for the graduation festivities for students of Liverpool University.
I was, however, directed to another building of God; the Metropolitan Church of Christ a mile or so down the road. A circular building with a rising conical roof, the inside was relatively new, and quite fetching. Some form of school function was happening, and I sat down to observe the goings-on. An entire grade level of schoolgirls burst into song, accompanied by a keyboard player. Suitably morose, they sang in harmony about something I couldn't quite decipher, but it made little difference. The acoustics of the massive, circular building transformed their voices into a reverb-drenched, echoing choir of beauty, and I sat transfixed.
Until I realised that my bag contained the Cradle of Filth tshirt I bought in Camden that reads 'Jesus is a Cunt' in large block letters on the back, and I felt like a heathen, gathering my bags and making an exit. Sadly, that was the only moment of purity or real enjoyment I felt in Liverpool, apart from taking off at the airport.
If Britain had an anus, then Liverpool might be it. From their days in the Cavern Club, the Beatles then moved on to playing club shows in Hamburg, and I think I know why they were so eager to get to another country.
With no real natural beauty to speak of, and the Mersey cutting a swathe through the city like a brown smear of shit, I wandered up from my pissy lodgings in the south of the city and meandered through its streets to see if I could find any diamonds in the rough.
Can't say I found many, to be honest. The imposing edifice of the Liverpool cathedral was suitably gothic and attractive, but to my dismay visitors were not allowed in due to it being taken over for the graduation festivities for students of Liverpool University.
I was, however, directed to another building of God; the Metropolitan Church of Christ a mile or so down the road. A circular building with a rising conical roof, the inside was relatively new, and quite fetching. Some form of school function was happening, and I sat down to observe the goings-on. An entire grade level of schoolgirls burst into song, accompanied by a keyboard player. Suitably morose, they sang in harmony about something I couldn't quite decipher, but it made little difference. The acoustics of the massive, circular building transformed their voices into a reverb-drenched, echoing choir of beauty, and I sat transfixed.
Until I realised that my bag contained the Cradle of Filth tshirt I bought in Camden that reads 'Jesus is a Cunt' in large block letters on the back, and I felt like a heathen, gathering my bags and making an exit. Sadly, that was the only moment of purity or real enjoyment I felt in Liverpool, apart from taking off at the airport.
posted by Elfin at 10:41 AM
3 Comments:
That’s so offensive, I’m appalled and will probably only come back to this blog to ensure it doesn’t happen again.
We use the metric fucking system, so it’s kilometres and not miles you philistine.
Did you want a 'Jesus is a Cunt' shirt too, then?
Yes, please!
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